Thursday, October 28, 2010

Goober Writers Anonymous--Postponed

Justine Dell was scheduled for today, but she's away from the blogosphere for a while, so her post will have to be postponed.  So instead, I want to talk about one line pitches!

We all know we have to have them.  I don't know about you, but I personally hate the stinkin' bastards.  I've been procrastinating as much as I could, but I decided to sit down and try one out yesterday.  Actually, the Query Blog gave me an incentive to test the one line pitch waters.

Let me know what you think!

When Ella finds out a fallen angel with a god-complex has plans to get her on a sacrificial slab or the whole galaxy is going to burn, she’s got to learn to battle the monster on the inside before she can dream of facing the monster on the outside in this STAR WARS meets PARANORMALCY YA Science Fiction. 

That's the best I could come up with in five minutes.  So, how about you?  Share your one line pitch and we can all give feedback on whether it's the most awesome thing we've ever heard, or might need a little work.

For help in crafting your pitch, check out this link.


  1. I'd ask for more based on that one-liner, Emily. Love it! I entered the one-line pitch contest at QT, too. Here's mine:

    Sure, he’s a bit messy and lazy and likes to pick on his sister, but eight-year-old Scott is stunned when Daddy sends him off to the Naughty Boy Factory, where he’ll have to outwit the evil director and her robot guards in order to avoid the unthinkable — becoming a boring, well-mannered mama’s boy.

  2. I love your pitch! Now I really want to know more.

  3. Very nice--especially having written it in only 5 minutes! I'm impressed. It is quite long, but it still doesn't seem overly convoluted or tangled. If you wanted to shorten, you could lose the comparison part, which isn't usually in a one-liner I don't think. I've never seen one there before, anyway. Actually, leaving the last words as the "monster on the outside" is a great chilling way to end the sentence, too! Sounds like a very intriguing read, and I like the phrasings, such as trying to get her on a sacrificial slab. ;o)

  4. Shannon--I love your pitch! Especially the Naughty Boy Factory. Too cute! Good luck with the contest!

    Golden Eagle--Thanks!

    Carol--Thank you! Actually, according to the link I provided at the bottom of the post, there are five different types of one line pitches. I went with the "this meets that" style to give a little extra idea of what the book is like. That link is awesome and very educational! I never knew how to craft a one-liner until I read it. :D

  5. Dah! I hate the one-line pitch thing! I'll have to check out the link! Here's my latest attempt.

    A sixteen-year-old girl strives to avenge the ritualistic murder of the girl who used to live in her bedroom before her- think The Lottery with magic, ghosts, and cafeteria food.

  6. I hate pitches. HATE THEM. Too long and it's 'convoluted' and too short means 'not enough info.'

    Here's my too short one.

    'Travis and Scarlett trek across America to discover why they returned from their graves in strange, new bodies with unexpected powers. But answers are hard to find when they are unwitting pawns in a bored god’s selfish game.'

  7. Vic--I absolutely love the last part about The Lottery. Based on that alone, I would definitely want to read more.

    Christi--Technically, a one-liner should only be one sentence, but I love how your story sounds. Good job!

  8. Emily - I found you again at last! Great pitches, everybody! I kind of like one-line pitches, but mine aren't necessarily any good. (I tried to enter the QT contest for THREE HOURS, but my computer/browser/something wasn't cooperating. Grr.)

    Incidentally, does anyone know if there's a way to have Google reader organize the blogs you follow in order of the most recent post, instead of alphabetically? (On the plus side, "E" is way earlier in the alphabet than "S"!)

  9. I like it. Very engaging. Tells a lot about your book.



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